The Transubstantiation

Growing up in my family of 6 kids we liked to play a lot of make believe. The best was pretending to be an authority figure of some sort. A parent, a teacher, a cop or robber, and of course, as we went to mass every Sunday and had a healthy fear of the lord, a priest. One day in the living room my sisters and I used potato chips and pretended to be priests and churchgoers. 


(Perfectly normal, right?)

Well, my mom yelled at us.

Apparently we were making a mockery of something really special. I thought we were being good Catholics. The shock that we were doing something wrong was immense. So much so that I still remember it 25 years later. The desire to pretend to be a priest may have waned as I grew older, but the guilt grew stronger, affecting every aspect of my life.

For example, for years now I have worked every Easter Brunch as a dutiful employee of various restaurants. Today I am only modestly employed and don’t work. Because of this modest employment, I also can’t travel to be with my family. The guilt is great. I wasn't able to get out of bed today. That is, until this great idea came to be. How better to assuage this Catholic guilt than with a Jello shot that would disappoint my family?

I present, the Transubtantiation. It’s just water and gelatin, but with a little faith, our favorite party god can turn it into wine. Let us pray.

The Transubstantiation:

Gelatin

Water

Faith

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